You can also think of it as a broken bone… you probably wouldn’t leave it to heal on its own. The stigma makes it harder sometimes, but it’s worth the fight. The Prophet Muhammed, peace be upon him, then replied “Tie your camel first, and then put your trust in Allah.” Think of therapy as tying your camel. When asked why he’s not tying down his camel, the Bedouin said that he puts his trust in God. There’s a famous hadith in the Islamic faith that tells the story of a Bedouin man who was leaving his camel untied. Though you may be aware of the stigma that exists around therapy, you may have still internalized societal messages telling you that seeking help means that something is wrong with you… Trauma looks different for each person, but one thing survivors have in common is that they often struggle with shame and self-blame, which can be extremely difficult to navigate alone. Know that trauma can make self-love even more difficult. The toughest days are the days that need your most compassion so take it one day at a time and go easy on yourself.Ģ. Remember that it’s a process, and it is not one that you can speed up. It’s a practice one you won’t be feeling every day but know that what looks like a step back to you may very well be progress. Self-love is not constant, nor is it permanent. There is no finish line, and there are no rules to this thing. Self-love is an ongoing process, and it looks different for each person. If you don’t know where to start… here are a few practical tips on how to actually love yourself (I know I mocked step-by-step guides, but chances are, if you clicked on this article, you wouldn’t mind reading some tips)ġ. In one way or another, self-love is crucial to developing a healthy relationship with yourself and those around you… and like all things in life, accepting and being kinder to yourself takes practice. Though it can feel like breaking apart, it is necessary because if you don’t confront the parts of you that you don’t want to confront, how much can you really accept? How much can you change? What if self-love is a lot uglier than it sounds and looks? What if self-love only really means self-acceptance? The truth is… the process is messy, the inner work is exhausting, and it often feels like quite the opposite of self-love. Most mental health professionals say that self-love requires a great deal of compassion and patience, an acknowledgement of one’s need for physical, psychological and spiritual growth, and most importantly, an accompaniment of actions that support that growth. What if we are just being sold toxic positivity in disguise? What if the version we are sold is oversimplified? Marketed as a destination and broken down into step-by-step guides that insist that you just have to love yourself because you are special. You can’t blame them when quotes like “do your squats, eat your veggies and don’t let boys be mean to you” and “be a man/ stand up for yourself” once roamed around the internet in the name of self-love.īut what if we consider self-love to be a cliché because the version that we are sold is just not it? What if the version we are sold overlooks the depths of it? Failing to consider the various internal battles that can make such a simple-sounding practice so much harder. For others, it’s considered cheesy and unnecessary. For some, it sounds like a luxury that’s tapped into by those that have too much free time. It seems to be something we are all in desperate need of, yet for something so complex, its true meaning is often overlooked. Now repeat over and over…and over again until you can finally say I now love myself. Switch between every social media platform for your daily dose of influencers spouting self-love quotes (disclaimer: there is absolutely no shame if those quotes help you).' ' Try to devour every self-help book that you can get your hands on. Self-love: a cliché or a necessity? So, what does this over-used term actually mean? Breast Pumps & Accessories Expand submenu.
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